Another Good Man Gone

Alan Bender passed away on Aug. 27, 2008 (see obit below). The Fredricks Communications world is, and always will be, poorer without him.

You’ll forgive me for including what seems to be such a personal note in this business communication. But you see, between me and Big Al, this business has always been personal.

Alan was more than my father-in-law or a Fredricks Communications Corporation board member. He was my benefactor, mentor, business advisor, confidant, information technology specialist and friend. Most of all, since the death of my own dad, Martin, five years ago, Alan has been my surrogate father.

Both men died at age 63, suddenly, unexpectedly and when they were in exceptional health. In a world that made sense, both would have lived to at least their mid-90s. One had a stroke, the other a massive heart attack.

Martin gave me, first, the upbringing necessary and, second, the reason I needed to start my business. Alan gave me the means and, more importantly, the courage to do it.

I was 34 years old when Dad died, more than half his age. For years I had been talking about going out on my own but had never done anything about it. I always told myself and others that I was going to do it some day. When he was suddenly gone, I realized that some day had to be soon. Life is way too short for talk; you must do before it is too late.

Alan knew of my unfocused desire. Shortly after Dad’s death, Alan offered the seed money I needed to start what has become Fredricks Communications.

It wasn’t just the money that made it possible for me to walk away from the safety net of a regular paying job. Alan’s offer came without the slightest hesitation. He said – without saying a word – that he believed in me and my ability to make it work. You have to remember, he wasn’t just betting on me. He was betting on the financial security of his only daughter and grandchildren, too.

He told me later it was the safest and surest bet he ever made. I wish I had always been so sure.

Without Alan, FredComm would not exist. Now it has to go on without him.

Godspeed, Big Al. We miss you already.

If you have an opportunity to be a mentor to someone, please do so. You won’t just be changing that person’s life, but your own, as well. If you had known Alan, you wouldn’t need any proof of that.